Tag Archives: recipe

Holiday Paleo Recipes: Eat at Your Own Risk

22 Dec

I realize I have not posted any recipes.  Since many of my friends are on the paleo diet,  I decided to experiment and come up with some paleo recipes for the holidays.  I am a vegetarian, so I didn’t actually eat any of these.  That might explain why I am still alive.

Paleo Recipes (Don’t try this at home):

Note: if you are vegetarian, you can substitute soy bacon and veggie crumbles for the hamburger.  You can use Earth Balance instead of mastadon lard.

Paleo chocolate chunk cookies
1 lb hamburger (grass fed)
2 cups chopped hazelnuts
1 package paleo chocolate chips (check for rocks)
1 tsp stone-ground baking soda

Heat oven or campfire to 375 degrees.  Stir ingredients together and form into patties.  Flip once.  When no longer pink inside, they should be safe to eat.  But I wouldn’t recommend it.

Paleo Bacon Birthday cake

This treat you can enjoy on your birthday.  Though I wouldn’t recommend it.

-1 lb bacon
-1 cup paleo stone-ground dark chocolate (check for rocks)
-3 cups freshly picked hazelnuts
grass-fed hamburger for garnish (optional)
1 tsp paleo baking powder (check for rocks)
1/4 cup paleo honey (check for bees)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees

Fry bacon until crisp.  Pulverize in food processor.  Pulverize hazelnuts.  Mix with stone- ground chocolate and other ingredients.  Add enough water until it looks like cake batter.  Pour into greased 8 x 8 inch pan.  Bake.

Meanwhile, brown hamburger in pan.  When cake is done, remove it and sprinkle with browned hamburger if desired.  Happy Birthday!  Eat at your own risk.

Paleo Snickerdoodles – you won’t be snickering if you eat these!

6 cups chopped hazelnuts
2 cups hamburger (grass fed)
2 strips bacon, fried
1 tsp stone-ground baking powder (check for rocks)
1 cup raw honey (check for bees)
1lb mastadon lard

Preheat oven to 400 degrees

Put everything in a food processor and blend.  Form into small patties.  Bake on greased cookie sheet until hamburger is no longer pink.  Yum! Eat at your own risk.


No Jello Salads Here Today

1 Sep


Most every blog seems to offer profound insights into parenting, social issues, tasty recipes or travel to exotic locations.

You won’t find any of that here.   Not that I am not a parent, have insights on social issues, concoct tasty recipes or travel to exotic locales like Des Moines, IA.  I could post my latest recipe for jello salad.  It involves radishes and green jello for that holiday look.

Or I could talk about my inability to overcome my jealousy of other moms whose hair lays flat when they get up in the morning and whose children don’t call each other stinky and jab each other in the back seat of the car. But that’s been done.

I could also post stunning pictures of hummingbirds, since one just buzzed by head.  But that would involve getting up to get the camera.  So no stunning pictures of hummingbirds today.

So, what’s left?  Horses.  Or maybe a horse-shaped jello salad.  Made in Des Moines, IA .  By hummingbirds.  But no, you won’t find even that here.  Instead you get this picture of Katie.  Have a great Labor Day!